This weekend I finally got around to seeing Hamilton. I know, I’m pretty late to the game on this one, and I have no good excuse. We actually had tickets to go see the original cast when they came to Atlanta, but then something called the pandemic shut down all the theaters and well… we never made it. Even when it came on Disney + I avoided watching it because I thought well, perhaps the time had passed. It wouldn’t be the same watching in on TV. Then, I learned that Hamilton (with a new cast) was coming to Atlanta again. At first I wasn’t interested. I thought, it’s a new cast, it won’t be the same. My sister was the one who changed my mind. I’m so glad she did (though I’m sure she came to regret my repetition of the line I’m not throwing away my shot to every question posed for the rest of the day). Honestly, it couldn’t have come at a better time, the reminder to take my shot despite overwhelming obstacles. It’s a clear reminder that everyone’s got to play with the hand they’ve been dealt, and when it’s your turn, take your shot. Isn’t it interesting that despite feeling like my chance had passed, I still got multiple opportunities to see it? It’s almost like that preverbal window of opportunity hadn’t closed after all, I just needed to open myself up to see it.

I told my wife at the beginning of 2024 that it feels like we’re on the precipice of something big. Another word for precipice is cliff, which is more like what this season of suspense feels like at times. What happens next? Who knows? The feeling seems to be mutual with most of my friends and colleagues, with many concerned about various unknowns.

With this in mind, I’ve been really trying to zero in on the few things that I can control, so as not to be distracted or overwhelmed by all the things I can’t control. Here’s a few questions that i’m considering as I do so.

What are the calculated shots that are mine to take right now in this season of life? For each of us that’s a different answer, but I’m certain that it points back to your purpose for being here and the opportunities in front of you.

What story do I want to tell (myself) about the decisions I make right now and its impact? I spent a while writing the answer to this one in my journal because this is a regular practice of mine when I find myself at a crossroads. To this day I still find myself looking back at old reflections and it brings me joy to find that there was alignment (and clarity) about not simply what I wanted to accomplish, but also who I wanted to become. Honestly, I think this might be the most important question of all to answer for any of life’s decisions because it forces you to get honest about what you value and why.

What do I want my daughters to learn from us as we live through this phase? As a father, one of the most important lessons I’ve learned is that it’s not what you say, it’s how you live that matters most to our kids. They’re always watching. I want them to know that it’s ok to take your shot, and regardless of how things work out, either way you grow. That’s why we talk about these kinds of things over the dinner table. I want them to see us wrestle with challenging situations and watch us grow from them. Otherwise, how will they learn that they can do the same thing? I suspect that these are the best teachable moments for them, the kind that pays dividends for a lifetime.

This all reminds me of another lesson I’ve been learning lately, about literally taking my shot on the basketball court. Over the past month or so I’ve been hooping with a group of dads from my daughter’s school and well, to be honest it’s been intimidating at times. I’m the smallest person on the court (by far), and probably one of the least skilled even though I enjoy the game. Most of the time I find myself hiding from the ball rather than looking for a chance to take a shot. During a recent game one of the dads encouraged me to keep shooting, keep looking to take shots because sometimes they’re screening to get me open looks. Imagine that, other people are trying to help me get a clean shot at the goal. I’ve gotten incrementally more aggressive on the court, but I keep coming back because I know I have something to prove, mostly to myself about my own willingness to take shots despite the adversity.

This game is a clear metaphor for my life right now, and in both cases I’m on the verge of something. I’m not throwing away my shot, and hopefully neither will you.

SDW3