Three black families went into the woods… My sister joked that sounds like the pitch for a horror movie rather than the magical time we just experienced this past weekend. It all started really on a whim. I happened to run into another parent one day after school and she mentioned that she and another group of families have been doing an annual camping trip for years. Intrigued, I wanted to know more but time passed and I sort of forgot about it. Until about a month ago we ran into each other again after school. This time, and somewhat randomly, I figured why not, let’s organize a camping trip. Sidenote, there’s an old Tedtalk about how to start a movement that talks about how the key lynchpin of growing a movement is the early adopters. Every movement needs one, people who see a somewhat oddball standing out from the crowd and decide to join in. That’s how a movement grows. Can you get someone to join you? Surprisingly, she was game and we had our first family on board.

Now, to be clear, I have no experience camping. I’m also not particularly good at organizing group trips. I’m more of a, paint the picture of the idea and let someone else fill in the details kind of person. Over the next few weeks I’d invited several families, but it was clear there wasn’t yet a real plan. I just kept saying, we’re going to go camping together this summer. Then one day at my youngest daughter’s birthday party a few of the families pressed for details. So, we settled on a real date, thanks to our resident expert (I call her Black Britt because she and her husband are from the UK) we booked campsites and had an actual list of what to prepare.

Not only had I never been camping before, but I’ve also never been camping with my wife and our four daughters. One thing that made our camping trip unique was that it was a group of #blackgirl dads, each of us with daughters ranging from 2 to 15. We only knew each other because our wives are close and our kids all go to the same school. So this trip would provide an opportunity to deepen our relationships and enjoy the great outdoors. We choose a location within an hour driving distance of home just in case, Sweetwater Creek State Park.

Here’s the thing: everything about this experience was amazing. From the moment I stepped foot on the camp grounds, it felt as if all the worries and burdens I’d been carrying about work, life, whatever, just started to melt away. I’m not sure what it was, perhaps it was simply the connection to the land or being near the water. It was giving me maroon vibes (for those unschooled, these are places where black folks escaped from slavery to form their own communities keeping their culture and history in tact). And I loved everything about it.

Whatever it was, I welcomed the momentary respite from my day to day. To be honest, I think we all needed it. Each of our families is comprised of successful people, entrepreneurs, people who have accomplished amazing things in their careers already. Black folks who have already spent most of our lives proving ourselves to the rest of the world that we belong. It can be pretty exhausting. So we took our time unwinding.

But for a few brief days, we found ourselves in an unbothered space, able to be free with ourselves and each other. We hiked to an old mill and the waterfalls. Some of the more adventurous adults crossed the rapids with the kids. We stayed up late roasting marshmallows. And then, while the kids played in the night air, the adults sat around the fire talking faith, politics, parenting, all the things. We sang our favorite classic hip hop and R&B songs. We let the kids lead us in the Boots on the Ground dance. You know how we do.

And the food…. my God I wasn’t prepared for the feast. I packed like a minimalist, editing down most of what the girls wanted to bring including hotplates and extra creature comforts. Fortunately, the other families had no such misgivings about bringing a bit of modern convenience to our camping experience. Folks brought hotplates and toaster ovens. We grilled steak, shrimp, stir-fried rice and chicken, asparagus, brocolini, hotdogs, hamburgers, all the things. And that was just for lunches and dinners. In the mornings we had toasted bagels and scrambled eggs.

Sleeping was a bit tricky. The first few hours were still warm and muggy in the tent, though it didn’t seem to stop the girls from being passed out within minutes. That’s what a long day of activities out in nature will do for you. I also didn’t mind the loud chorus of cicadas after the first night. Next time we’ll choose a cooler month, probably May or September (we’re already planning a next time).

All told, on our final morning together it felt like none of us were quite ready to leave. Something about the way we lived these past few days, it felt like it was important for us to bring some elements of our camping experience back with us to our regular lives. Maybe slow down the pace a bit. Perhaps actually pause and let our feet feel the ground more often. Let the kids run wild and free, and notice the places they take us in their adventures. Give ourselves the opportunity to feel the acceptance that comes with being in community with those like-minded. I can’t wait to do it all over again soon. Who knows, this just might be the healing work of rest that more of us need.

SDW3