In the movie Click, Adam Sandler plays a mid-career professional frustrated with the day to day grind of growing a company alongside his roles of being a father and a husband. Objectively speaking, he has a pretty good life. But, as many of us tend to do, he focused much more on what was wrong than what was right. And as parents in the throes of raising children at any age, there’s an abundance of what’s wrong that you can focus on. Tripping over the shoes left on the floor (again). The endless laundry. The smart ass teenagers. You get it. Add in the career pressure of trying to figure things out to make a company grow and you’ve got a powder keg waiting to erupt. It was only a matter of time. No wonder he was looking for an escape.

In the movie while venturing out for an errand he finds his escape at a Bed, Bath, and Beyond. (Side note: anyone else used to hate this store? I remember my wife used to love shopping there… it just felt so overwhelming like a never ending Costco, but for linens). Anyways, in the “beyond” part, he finds a weird old guy played billiantly by Christopher Walken who offers him a remote control that he can use to speed past the annoying “little things” in his life. But it comes with a warning… use it wisely, because once he starts to put his life on auto-pilot, unintended consequences could occur.

The rest of the movie involves him learning just how much he missed by skipping over the seemingly mundane, and even difficult moments in life just to get to the good part. The bottom line is, you actually can’t skip to the good part. Everything that is happening right now is a part of it.

This resonates so much with me right now at this stage of fatherhood because I really want to be done with a few things. I want to be done with struggling to build a company, but instead be at the stage where I can tell the testimony of how we made it over. Except, those answers haven’t come yet. I’m still taking the test, and I don’t know how it ends.

Similarly, I want to be done with hectic sports and school schedules and a loud house filled with kids running around, sometimes arguing, but mostly just living their lives at a high decible level. Except, when that happens that means that they’ll be adults, out in the world. I already miss them as babies and toddlers, imagine how much more I’ll miss them in three years when the oldest starts to graduate and the rest are close behind.

Now, if you gave me a magical remote that would allow me to fast-forward through some of it, I would definitely be tempted. But then what would I be missing out on? Speaking of which, after seeing that movie over 20 years ago, it prompted my friend’s father to quit his job, sell his home, and relocate across the country to be closer to his daughter and now grandchildren. He’s since been able to enjoy nearly two decades of being a part of their lives all because of a decision to wake up and get off auto-pilot.

The point is, yes things can be overwhelming right now at this stage of life (really at any stage of life) as a parent. Last night we sat down around the dinner table to eat at the ungodly hour of 9pm, but that’s what we had to work with after school activities and a volleyball game. But, this is my life right now, and for better or for worse I don’t want to miss a thing. There’s too much at stake to live my life on auto-pilot.

SDW3