I read a quote this morning by Mike Murdoch which I love. He says, those who do not discern your worth, are disqualified for relationship. I’ve been thinking a lot lately about the question, how do we communicate our worth to others? First it starts with a correct understanding of our own worth right? This is particularly important for me as a parent because I want my brilliant daughters to have positive images of themselves, but I also don’t want them to be inflated. I think at the end of the day, what most of us in this life are looking for is validation from someone, somewhere. Here is where my faith provides me guidance.
I think we rely on others too often to define how we view ourselves. Self esteem is so fragile, it really has to be built on the right foundations, otherwise you’ll go through your life trying to measure up to everyone else but the only true measuring stick that matters. I want my beautiful black girls to grow up knowing that they’re brilliant, not because of what others say about them, but because of what they believe about themselves. And their belief will be informed by their faith. I want them to have an accurate understanding of their perfections and imperfections through the lens of how God views them. Anything else will create a skewed perception of themselves.
That’s why it’s my job as a parent to model this aspect of my faith. I’ll continue to show my daughters what it looks like to accept me as God accepts me, and how much confidence and empowerment that brings to my daily life. And along the way, I’ll point to a guy named Jesus who found His validation in God. That approach seemed to work out well for Him.